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Jonah Hex Review

Jonah Hex is like that kid from "Pretty Fly" - it tries so hard to be cool that the result is just embarrassing. The source comic is a solid mix of wild west adventure and badass antihero, but they still felt the need to add extra plot twists, wild coincidence, and bizarre weapons of mass destruction. At least Wild Wild West recognized that it was ridiculous...Jonah Hex feels like the producers thought they were making the next Lonesome Dove (note: it's not a good sign when a movie compares unfavorably to Wild Wild West).

Even ignoring the source material (as the movie makers did), there were a lot of problems here. Among the highlights:

·Josh Brolin sounded like he was having a lot of problems with the prosthetics for the first half of the movie.

·John Malkovich's Turnbull had a needlessly complicated back story that somehow still failed to tell us anything about him. He was like Dr. Evil without the depth of character.

·The final fight sequence was one of the worst staged fight scenes I've seen. The intercuts between fantasy and reality served only to make both of them impossible to get into.

·The super weapon was...not good. Like Turnbull, it was needlessly complicated without actually doing anything. They crammed a life-sized game of Mouse Trap into a stylized version of the CSS Virginia, which fed a seven-barrel cannon with six explosive cannonballs and one "trigger" cannonball.

There were a couple of highlights, though. The assassin was actually pretty well played, with a nice quasi-Joker thing going on. Also, Jeffrey Dean Morgan was in it, but was not credited. I like to think that he stopped by, did his lines, and grabbed his paycheck.

Collector/Modeler Interest:
Pretty lacking: if you were really ambitious, you could scratchbuild the ship, or add Gatling guns to a horse model.


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